I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
