If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Randomize