I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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