I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
