So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
