i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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