he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
