Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
