She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize