Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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