oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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