"it" just moved
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Randomize
