We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
