The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
