508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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