This girl is more easily done than said...
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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