omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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