The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
