Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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