It's like God shit irony all over that family
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
