is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize