I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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