dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize