I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
not ubering you a puppy
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
