sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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