I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
