Swine flu. Run for my life!
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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