If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
