The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
