Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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