6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
