no, he came in my armpit
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
