we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
