I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
