The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
