69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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