Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
