More tranny stories later!
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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