i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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