so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
