I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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