I just cut my nipple shaving
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize