um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
