You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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