Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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