i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
