with your own penis?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize