I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Randomize
