I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
only if we run a train.
done.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
