I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Randomize
